Pharmacies, booze shops and supermarkets are booming right now and this is not because we have a secret stash of money! It’s because we are anxious and fearful about life in the here and now and our future. Anxiety, Overeating and Overdrinking are all habits. And the good news is that they can be unlearned!
I heard a client say the other day that her husband is judgemental of her wine drinking and yet he sits back in the evening and eats just as many calories in chocolate!
Then there are people who are critical of those who take medication to calm their nerves or to stop depression.
Sad but true, I hear a lot about men and women who are suffering from anxiety and panic attacks are told ‘To just get over it!’
The truth is as human beings we are all vulnerable at any given time. It’s how our mind interprets that vulnerability that is key.
It is so frustrating for me to see how easy it is to judge others because our ‘go-to’ coping strategy is socially more acceptable or perhaps more hidden.
Meet the personality behind our vulnerabilities
I want to share with you a powerful psychology that has personally changed my life and my clients lives too! I have been using this method for over 24 years with incredible results.
The principle of this method is that we are all made up of many parts or ‘sub-personalities’ that drive us to behave in unkind ways to ourselves. This can be also to the detriment of our relationship with others too.
The culprit behind all of this is our Inner Critic!
This powerful internal voice is behind many different forms of anxiety, overeating, overdrinking, depression, and negative thinking. It is also behind that guilt we feel when we have that extra piece of cake or that extra glass of beer or wine.
Neuroscientists believe we all have an Inner Critic. And, and originally it was there when we lived a simpler life and there were genuine life or death situations… just outside our caves in which we lived.
It was a way to forewarn us about what may lie ahead. However, in modern society, those fears are not bears or big cats. BUT viruses, money issues, relationship breakdowns, job dissatisfaction, and many other problems.
What does the Inner Critic sound like?
The Inner Critic loves it when we get dumped by a boyfriend and it will say things like ‘He thinks you are fat!’ Or, ‘He thinks your best friend is smarter than you!’
When you have anxiety about life the Inner Critic will say things like ‘You don’t cope as well as others! What is your problem?’
When you drink too much it will say ‘People think you are an alcoholic’ or ‘If people really know how much you drank, they would think you have a problem!’ With someone who may eat or drinks too much… or needs medication to feel that little bit better, you can be guaranteed the Inner Critic has played a role in making that person feel bad about it.
It becomes a vicious cycle and the irony is it makes us eat more, drink more and feel much more dependent on exactly what we want to become independent of!
Once a happy person…? Just to say, I know it doesn’t take much for a once happy go lucky person to fall on hard times for one reason or another. It’s the perfect storm for the Inner Critic to rear its head. This is when that voice takes center stage and becomes extremely vocal about ‘How that person screwed up.
I know from personal experience how hard it is to resist the little bag of sweets when you want to calm down (that was my thing). I also know that having the second or third glass of wine seems like a great quick fix that hits the spot perfectly at the time.
But, there is a reason why it seems like a good idea at the time! When we eat sugary things or drink alcohol our brains actually produce more dopamine. This creates a chemical reaction that shuts the Inner Critic up for just a while. It literally goes away and we get some space from its repetitive, demonic voice.
However, it doesn’t last long and before we know it, it rears its ugly head and comes back with a vengeance. Then the vicious cycle of eating or drinking too much continues.
For those who don’t overeat or drink alcohol, it could be that the lethargy from the sheer exhaustion of the Inner Critic makes you procrastinate. It says’ It won’t work’ or ‘You will fail’ and then you decide to retreat because it all just feels too hard.
Now for the good news….the Inner Critic is not the only voice.
There is the opposite part I call the Intuitive Healthy Part that is reading this blog right now.
It is the part of the brain that stimulates inspiring thoughts within you. It’s the part that wants you to feel happier. The purpose is to protect you by inspiring courage, tenacity, and faith in your ability. Your ability to like yourself a little bit more and forgive yourself a lot more!
When this beautiful part is more present in your daily inner conversations, you don’t need to overeat (or drink) to run away from the Inner Critic and what is says about you.
Try to think of it a bit like Luke Skywalker in Star Wars when he hears that Inner Voice telling him… Use the Force Luke… It is telling him to trust!
If you’d like to discover a way to Calm Your Inner Critic and Reduce Anxiety, click here.
Want to find a solution to reduce your drinking so that you can enjoy life without just one more drink? Click here to watch this short video.
Sharing ways for us to live long and strong and happy lives in bodies we love for life!
*This blog post was created by Georgia Foster.